30+ Vagina, pussy and cunt jokes.



Is pussylips one word? Or should I spread them apart?.

- TOP pussy joke from Adminus Anonimous, the fun manager.

Сrazy people telling jokes are ready for fun


  • What do vagina lips says to each other ?
    "We used to be tight"

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  • A mother in law said too her sons wife " I don't mean to be rude but the baby doesn't look like my son " The wife then lifted up her skirt and said " I don't mean to be rude either but it's a Fanny not a photocopier"

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  • Just received a parcel from Holland this morning !
    I opened it and there was a rubber Fanny inside !!
    I Thought ' That's nice , Two lips from Amsterdam !!'

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  • Q. How does a woman scare a gynecologist? A. By becoming a ventriloquist!

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  • McVities have just bought out a new biscuit range, 'Clitoris-Creams'.
    They carry a guarantee. "One lick and you'll want to eat the box"

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  • You know when you get that urge to eat something just because it's there !!??!!
    Well that's how I lost my job as a gynaecologist !!

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  • What do you call
    a female peacock ...

    A peacunt .

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  • Top 10 reasons to eat pussy :
    👅👅👅
    #10 If pussy wasn't meant to be kissed they wouldn't have lips.
    #9 Keeps your lips moist, you'll save a fortune on ChapStick.
    #8 The best cure for a dry mouth is a wet pussy.
    #7 It's Vegan friendly if you are into that sort of thing.
    #6 The taste.
    #5 He who does not suck the clit does not get to hit. Coochiticus.
    #4 She is more than likely return the favor( if you do it right).
    #3 The taste (it's worth saying twice).
    #2 The way she moans when you're sucking out her soul.
    #1 It's Pussy duh! Eat up like a bigboy.

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  • - what did one vagina lip say to the other?
    - "we used to be so tight until we let some dick cum between us"

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  • A vagina is like the weather. Once its wet, it's time to go inside.

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  • Q: What do you call a newspaper with blood on it?
    A: a periodic.

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  • Boy: "Want to hear a joke about my dick? Never mind, its too long."
    Girl: "Wanna hear a joke about my pussy? Never mind, you won't get it."

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  • Q: What's the difference between a bowling ball and a pussy?
    A: You can only fit three fingers inside a bowling ball!

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  • Q: Why are pussy pubic hairs curly?
    A: You would poke your eye out if it were straight!

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  • Q: Why was two piece swimsuit invented?
    A: To separate the hairy from the dairy.

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  • Q: What did the blind man say when he passed the fish market?
    A: Good morning ladies.

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  • Q: What's the difference between a clit and a mobile phone?
    A: Nothing, every cunt's got one!

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  • Q: How do you know when your husband eats too much pussy?
    A: When he goes to the dentist to get a haircut!

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  • Q: What's the difference between parsley and pussy?
    A: Nobody eats parsley.

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  • Q: How do you know if you have an overbite?
    A: If your eating pussy and it tastes like shit!

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  • Q: What is the irritating part around a blonde's pussy?
    A: The other guys waiting their turn!

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  • Q: What's the difference between eating pussy and driving in a snowstorm?
    A: When you eat pussy, you can always see the arsehole in front of you!

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  • Q: What's the definition of a tongue-twister?
    A: A spiral pussy!

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  • Q: What do pimps and dogs have in common?
    A: They both ate pussy.

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  • Q: What do you call a Roman soldier with a smile on his face and a piece of hair between his two front teeth?
    A: A GLAD-HE-ATE-HER.

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  • Q: What do you call the space between the twat and the shitter?
    A: Twitter.

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  • Q: Why do blondes wear tampons?
    A: Because crabs like bungee jumping too!

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  • Q: What do you call a policewoman who shaves her pubes?
    A: Cuntstubble.

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  • Q: Why is a woman's pussy like a public restroom?
    A: They both feel good, but you wonder who has been there before you!

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  • Q: What's the difference between balls and a pussy?
    A: the harder the pussy, the more balls you need.

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  • Q: Why do women have vaginas?
    A: So that men will speak to them!

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  • Q: What do the Mafia and a pussy have in common?
    A: One slip of the tongue, and you're in deep shit.

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  • Q: Why is a vagina just like the weather?
    A: When it's wet, it's time to go inside.

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  • Q: How is a pussy like a grapefruit?
    A: The best ones squirt when you eat them.

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