30+ Hilarious Fart Jokes That Will Really Give You A Lift.



How do you know when a moth farts?
it flies in a straight line....

- BEST fart joke from Adminus Anonimous, the fun manager.

Сrazy people telling jokes are ready for fun


  • I am the type to fart in a crowded train and get just as upset as everyone else.

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  • Releasing a long silent fart as I walk through first class on the way to my economy seat is definitely my favorite part of boarding an aircraft.

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  • I asked my math coach why she's always passing gas during our lessons.
    She said, "Because I'm your tutor."

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  • My wife pointed out when I farted.
    It was an ass toot observation.

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  • What do they call it when
    a writer farts? A draft.

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  • What does a Stormtrooper say when he farts?
    Pew pew pew.

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  • A human fart can be louder than a saxophone solo.
    I found that out at my daughters school concert.

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  • I farted in my wallet and now I have gas money.

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  • What would Britney Spears say after, as usual, she let one rip? "Oops, I did it again."

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  • What do you do to get a bubble bath after dinner? Just have beans for dinner.

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  • How do you know a clown farted? It smells funny.

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  • What happened to the man who only ate Skittles?
    He farted rainbows.

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  • If you sneeze and fart at the same time, your body takes a screenshot.

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  • How does NASA pass gass?
    They fart using their ass-teroids.

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  • When is a fart joke acceptable?
    When it doesn’t stink!

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  • I used to cough in public to hide my farts, but now I fart in public to hide my coughs.

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  • Why does everyone always think Piglet farted?
    He plays with Pooh!

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  • What do you call a dinosaur fart?
    A blast from the past!

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  • Why do farts smell?
    So that deaf people can enjoy them too.

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  • Laugh and the world laughs with you.
    Fart and the world stops laughing.

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  • Why is love like a fart?
    If you have to force it, it’s probably shit.

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  • What did the menstrual pad write on the “thank you” note to the fart?
    You are the wind beneath my wings.

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  • Why did the fart miss graduation?
    It got expelled.

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  • Why did the chicken cross the road?
    She didn’t want the other chickens to notice that she farted.

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  • A fart is like success.
    It only bothers you when it’s not your own.

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  • I didn’t fart in front of my partner until we got married.
    Her family wasn’t too impressed.

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  • I farted at work yesterday, and my coworker opened the window.
    It must have been bad — we’re flight attendants.

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  • What do you get when an aristocrat farts?
    A noble gas.

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  • I got fired from my job delivering leaflets on flatulence awareness.
    Unfortunately, I let one rip.

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  • Farts are like children.
    You don’t mind your own, but you can’t stand other people’s.

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  • Why did everyone notice when Bill Gates farted in the Apple store?
    Because they didn’t have any Windows.

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  • Why did the man stop telling fart jokes?
    He was told that his jokes stink.

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  • Why won’t the skeleton fart in public?
    He doesn’t have the guts.

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  • Two flies are sitting on a piece of poop.
    One fly farts and the other fly cries, “Hey! I’m trying to eat here!”

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  • I didn’t fart…
    My butt likes you so much it blew a kiss.

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  • What do you call a ghost fart?
    A spirit bomb.

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  • What’s invisible and smells like carrots?
    A bunny fart!

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  • Why do you have to watch out for ninjas’ farts?
    They’re silent — but deadly.

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More fart jokes on the following pages...